How to Tell You're Not Cool

It's one thing to be 34 years old, married, father to a 2-year-old, and paying a mortgage on a three-bedroom, two-bathroom suburban house. It's quite another thing entirely to hear one of your favorite catchphrases uttered on one of television's most depressingly middle-of-the-road sitcoms.

Yet there I was the other night, getting ready to pack it in for the day, with the TV on as sheer background noise, when what do I hear? Jere Burns (yes, the guy who will forever be known only as "Kirk" from Dear John) saying, "That's what I'm talking about!" on the awful Good Morning, Miami.

I am now in search of a new favorite catchphrase. Do people still say, "Book 'em, Dano"?